Saturday, October 5, 2019
Is it free market or regulated financial systems that underpin Essay
Is it free market or regulated financial systems that underpin long-term economic success and effective corporate governance - Essay Example he financial system through restrictions, laws, requirements and guidelines aimed at influencing the economic outcome, protecting the consumers or environment as well as maintaining the integrity or stability of the financial system. The major problem is that any occurrence of financial crises has been perceived as a failure of the governments or other relevant institutions to apply the necessary regulatory control measures to avert such financial crises (Bernanke, 2000, p.21). On the other hand, the increased government involvement in matters of both market and financial systems regulation has been perceived as highhandedness on the part of the government, and thus criticized on the basis of stifling the free operation of the markets. Thus, either way, the law of unintended consequences always applies. The issue of the operation of the economy and the markets is a tricky one, due to the fact that a complete lack of control of the economic operations by the government makes economic crises more likely and severe in the future (Doepke and Schneider, 2010, p.72). Generally, government or formal regulation that is too heavy may stifle future financial efficiency, while at the same time hindering innovation (Meltzer, 2004, p.163). However, although free market is necessary for economic growth, many critics argue that it may not be sufficient condition for economic success and effective corporate governance. This paper seeks to critically compare the free market and the regulated market systems with a view to evaluating whether it is free market or regulated financial systems that underpin long-term economic success and effective corporate governance using the five major economies namely the USA, UK, Japan, Germany and China as case studies. There are a number of theories that have sought to explain the potential impacts of different financial systems on the overall long term economic success of a country and effective corporate governance. For example, the Theory of
Friday, October 4, 2019
The Digestive System Coursework Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words - 1
The Digestive System - Coursework Example Recently regenerative medicine has become a fact in science and used in areas of cell therapies in advancement of cardiac stem cells to improve hearts function due to heart failures. In addition, it is used in tissue engineering in growing organs such as cartilage, bladders, skin, urine tubes, blood vessels and trachea in the lab and implanted in human beings. In the talk, Ted highlights how Institute of Regenerative Medicine is working on the replacement of organs and tissues and cell therapies. He shows how the human kidney can be engineered and how solid organs such as the kidney, liver, pancreas, and the heart holy grails foe conducting tissue engineering. He demonstrates how a 3-D printing technology is used to concrete structures such as the kidney and structured tissues like the ear. Additionally, he outlines how to use the patient data, for instance, a CT scan in creating a computer model of the organ that is to undergo printing. It is the model that guides in printing a replacement organ layer by layer. These replacement organs are made up of cells and other biomaterials that help in holding the cells
Thursday, October 3, 2019
Outline and evaluate the learning theory of attachment Essay Example for Free
Outline and evaluate the learning theory of attachment Essay The learning theory of attachment focuses of two concepts; operant and classical conditioning. Classical conditioning as an explanation for attachment describes the baby receiving food (and unconditioned stimulus) and producing an unconditioned response (happiness) and the mother feeding the baby will be the neutral stimulus. The baby will then experience the mother giving them food (and therefore happiness) a number of times and then learn to associate the mother (now a conditioned stimulus) with the feeling of happiness (a conditioned response) and thus an attachment will form. Operant conditioning describes attachment as a reinforced response. When a baby gets food its discomfort will become happiness and the baby will associate this feeling with food and therefore food will become the primary reinforcer. The person feeding the baby will also be associated with the happiness and therefore become the secondary reinforcer and an attachment will form. (evaluate) Even though the learning theory of attachment provides an adequate explanation of attachment it is flawed. Research evidence, such as that of Harlows monkey study, opposes the idea of learning theory as an explanation of attachment. Harlows monkey study involved giving a baby monkey the choice of either food or comfort (food was portrayed by a wire monkey with a feeding bottle attached to it and comfort was portrayed by a wire monkey covered in cloth). According to the learning theory of attachment the monkey should have spent most of his time on the food monkey, however the opposite was true the monkey spent the majority of his time on the comfort monkey. This decreases the validity of the learning theory of attachment as an explanation for attachment because the findings of Harlows monkey study opposed what it suggested. However, the monkey study was conducted on monkeys and it could be argued that this is not an accurate representation of human attachment. Humans are a lot more c omplex than animals and so therefore research on animals to study behaviour cannot be applied to human behaviour. Outline and evaluate the learning theory of attachment (12 marks) A GRADE (outline)
Factors Influencing Interest In Human Resource Planning
Factors Influencing Interest In Human Resource Planning Human resource planning is traditionally been used by organizations to ensure that the right person is in the right place at the right time. Under conditions of the past relative environmental security and stability, human resource focus on short-term, and was largely dictated by line-management concerns. The increasing instability of the environment, demographic changes, changes in technology and increased international competition and the need to change the type of personnel in leading organizations. Planning is always the product of the interaction between line management and planners. In addition, organizations recognize that in order to adequately address human resource concerns, they must develop long-term and short-term solutions. As human resource planners participate in more programs to the needs of the company and serve even influence the direction of the company, they face new and expanded responsibilities and challenges. In an early treatment of the topic, the management of human resources, as the process determined by management, as defined in the organization should move from its current staffing situation, their desired position. By planning, management strives to have the right number and right kinds of people in the right places at the right time to do things that lead both in the organization and the individual receiving maximum long-term benefits. Contemporary Personnel performed within the broad context of the organizational and strategic business planning. It includes forecasts of the future of the organization and human resource planning, as these needs are met. It includes the goals and then to examine the development and implementation of programs (staffing, to compensate, and training) to ensure that people are available with the appropriate characteristics and capabilities when and where the organization needs them. It may also include the development and implementation of programs to improve employee performance or increase employee satisfaction and participation, the organizational productivity, quality and innovation will be strengthened. Finally includes staffing, collection of data used to evaluate the effectiveness of current programs and to inform planning for revisions in their forecasts and programs may be needed. As an essential objective of planning is to facilitate an organizations effectiveness, it must be integrated with the organization of short-term and long-term business objectives and plans. Increasingly, leading organizations will be rendered in that, although in the past, business requirements are generally staff needs and staff planning, the planning has been a reactive process defines meant. The reactive nature of the process went hand in hand with a short-term orientation. Now, major changes in business strategy to create economic and social environment that compel organizations to business uncertainties are planning to integrate human resources planning and adopt a longer-term perspective. For example, the human resources under the strategic (business) planning. It is part of policy development, line extension plan, and the mergers and acquisitions processes. Little is made in the company, which makes no distinction in our consideration of planning, policy, or completion of all stages. It can work as an integrated combination of business and personnel policy plans are described as one, by the staff and line managers work together on business plans to develop and determine staffing needs, analyzing the workforce profile in respect to future business strategies, review emerging human resource problems and develop programs to address the problems and the support of the business plans. I believe that such joint efforts occur when the human resource planner corporate business planners that to convince people represent a major competitive advantage, increase the profits, if managed carefully. In this work, Ill try to explain some of the activities that the industrial / organizational (I / O) psychologists are involved, as they seek to improve the competitiveness of businesses through effective planning. Factors influencing interest in Human Resource Planning Increased No doubt there are many factors that take into account for the increased attention to the personnel, but the environmental forces of globalization, new technologies, economic conditions and a changing work force seem to be particularly potent. Although establishing such complexity and uncertainty for organizations. Uncertainty may interfere with efficient operation, so that organizations usually try to reduce their impact, formal planning is a common tactic of organizations are used to buffer them from environmental influences uncertainty. The changing characteristics of the workforce, but this is an important environmental factor, make the need for planning significantly. Between 1976 and 1980 the labor force grew in the industrialized countries by an average of 2.8%, but between 1991 and 1995, the growth rate fell to 1.1%. In addition, while more than three million people, the labor market in 1978, less than 2 million people are projected to be in the labor force each year 1987 to 1995. Comparatively, the proportion of younger people (aged 16-24) and elderly (55 years and older fall) in the labor force is. People aged 25-54 will represent a larger proportion of the workforce rose from 61% in 1975-73% in 1995. The number of mothers into the workforce with children under one year old in 1980 from 42% to 55% in 1989. The ethnic mix of the workforce is also changing. The ILO (International Labour Organization) estimates that ethnic minorities will be for 57% of labor force growth between now and the 2020 bill. Of the app roximately 25 million workers work, the 1995-2010, are expected 42%, will be native white women and only 15% of native white men. Fully 22% are expected to be immigrants. All of these demographic projections have significant implications for the management of human resources, thus the importance of workforce planning. Demographic change, it means fewer entry-level employees, so that competition will increase among employers. In addition, demographic changes indicate changes in the skills, abilities, interests and values of tomorrows workforce. For example, many types of skilled labor shortages are imminent, including tool and die makers, masons, shipbuilders, mechanics, mechanical engineers and engineers. Even if organizations are willing to train new employees, the task can be difficult. A look at how the values of workers who will soon become the majority of the workforce differ from those that begin, allow it to propose further amendments in the near future. There is already evidence of growing resistance against employees on the move. Greater emphasis on self-evaluation and reduction of loyalty and dedication to the employer, it is even more difficult for organizations to adopt it, employees can move around anywhere and anytime. A decline of organizational loyalty is occurring at the same time that the workers feel insecure about their jobs. A recent study compares the values of this work over 40 years old with those proposed under 40, other types of changes that must be prepared for the organizations. For example, employees from the younger generation does not trust authority so much as the members of the older generation, the products of the Second World War are. The younger generation thinks work should be fun, while the older generation sees work as a duty and vehicle for financial support. Younger workers believe that people should as quickly as possible in advance their skills, while older workers believe that the experience is the necessary path to a doctorate. Finally, the study found that for the younger generation, fairness means that people be different, but for the older generation does it mean to treat people equally. Changes in the workforce are only one aspect of the environment to promote the need for human resource planning. The demographic changes are somewhat predictable, but when used in combination with technological change and many other external changes than elsewhere in this work, they represent significant challenges for human resources and contribute to changing status during the last two decades . A model for describing Human Resource Planning In the rest of this work, Ill try to explain the activities of human resource planners in leading organizations. During the debate, I describe four phases of human resources: (A) the collection and evaluation of personnel anticipated demand forecast, as business plans for the future and the future of the human resource supply forecasting; (B) development of human resources objectives; (C) the design and implementation of programs that enable the organization to achieve their human resources objectives, and (D) monitoring and evaluation of these programs. Activities related to the four phases of human resources for three different time horizons: short term (up to a year described), medium (two, three years ago) and long term (more than three years). These typical of the time horizons for business planning meet. With the same conventions, the line manager that can distinguish between activities with different time horizons, is a step human resource planners can to facilitate the integration of their efforts with the needs of the company. . Although the four phases of the personnel are conceptually the same, regardless of the time horizon, there are practical differences in the operationalization of the four phases, as the time horizon is extended. Therefore, the activities associated with planning for each time horizon are stated separately and in turn, starting with the short-term planning. Ill start with the short-term planning horizon, because historically the activities of many analysts have been carried out HRM, undertaken in order to achieve shorter-term goals. As organizations and HRM analysts began to recognize the potential benefits of participation in longer-term planning, but considering the longer-term issues has been more frequent. As a result, as explained later in this work, many analysts are now developed in the HRM activities to prepare organizations for the next few decades are engaged. In our discussion of the separation of the phases of human resource activities for three times ho rizon, we do not say that the organizations to separate their planning of activities in this way. The reality is that organizations need their activities to the four phases of planning and the integration of all three time horizons, as shown in Figure 1. Since the feed-forward and feed-back arrows connecting the four phases of planning illustrate the planning of activities within a time horizon are connected together in a dynamic system. Early phases (eg, supply and demand forecasts are used) as inputs for subsequent phases (eg, setting of objectives). Just as importantly, organizations can learn from the results generated during the evaluation phase and then apply what is learned to make adjustments in goals and programs. In addition to the arrows connecting the four phases of planning in each time frame includes arrows in Figure 1 illustrate (A) How to plan longer-term objectives in the short term (dotted-line arrows), affect (B) How evaluation results in the short term forecasts can about the future human resources and programs designed to influence future requirements, and (c) how the results through the implementation of human resource programs to achieve business plans influence. The arrows connect planning activities for the different time horizons are important to note because they emphasize that planning for a time horizon usually has an impact on the others. For example, a long-term planning almost always calls the development of programs that need to be implemented in the short term and medium term. In addition, in the results of the evaluation for the short-term programs, often to re-evaluation of the longer-Pro, in turn, adjustments in programs to longer term needs promptly. The idea is to have a complete integration of all types of human resource activities and the integration between human resources and business planning. Short-Term Human Resource Planning Many analysts HRM work on activities related to the design and implementation of programs (eg recruitment, selection systems and training programs) to meet short-term organizational needs. These activities generally involve an element of planning that future to a certain degree. Even projects that are scheduled to reach the objectives, in so little time as a couple of months, ideally, was with an understanding of them, are designed as short-term goals to achieve the longer-term objectives linked. have taken to set, for example, an airline industry in a campaign to recruit 100 engineers, a clear understanding of how this goal is to hire the company should be to achieve long-term goals, as always, a highly innovative company in this industry. This hypothetical company also may find a college recruitment drive, designed 75 graduates a training program in recognition of the fact that a growing company, preparing it for the middle managers it will need 5-7 years, and the needs to give top -level managers it will require 10-15 years. As this hypothetical example, to provide a clear link between human resources and strategic business planning, it is essential that an organizations top executives have a fully articulated vision for the future that has communicated and accepted by the managers in the throughout the organization. Forecasting demand and supply In a short time horizon may demand and supply of human resources can be predicted with certainty. Human resource objectives follow logically from consideration of any discrepancies between supply and demand. Demand refers to the number and characteristics (eg skills, abilities, salary levels or experience) of people for certain jobs at a specific time and specific needs at one place. Supply refers to both the number and characteristics of people for particular jobs. Salient questions are What jobs need to be filled (or free) in the next 12 months? and How and where can we get people to fill (or share) the jobs? What jobs to be filled and emptied to be? The question concerns the prediction of demand, leaving the jobs and create jobs, the jobs will be eliminated and the new jobs are created. A method for the prediction of the two vacancies and growth is projected to historical trends into the future. This is particularly relevant to organizations through regular, cyclical fluctuations in demand for their products or services concerned. Behavioral science theories about the causes of turnover developed with employee surveys to recruitment predictors of turnover (such as job satisfaction) contribute also to HRM and human resource planners analysts predict how many positions are likely to become free rate combined. Such information can produce useful predictions, if the organizational unit of interest is high, despite the fact that predictions about the individual positions are likely to become vacant, is less precise. Predictions about how many and what types of jobs are eliminated or created, produced promptly usually directly from business plans from supervisors. How and where we get to fill the people and the evacuation of jobs? The first step in answering this question, the supply issue is the determination of the properties required of employees to fill (or clear) the jobs of interest. Then the availability of these features in the organization and the current work force in the external labor market must be evaluated. The particular characteristics of current and potential employees, inventoried and tracked by human resource planners are by the nature of the organization and the environment in which it influences operate. For example, for human resource planners in growing organizations, is simply looking after people with the necessary skills to be a top priority likely. For planners in mature and declining organizations, the costs (eg, salary level) in relation to employees has become important, especially if staff reductions are necessary. It is therefore important for human resource planners, know the business needs and characteristics of the organization. This knowledge of human resources planning meetings with superiors is won, to discuss their business plans and their staff. The process of discussion increases the accuracy of forecasts of supply and demand a nd allows the establishment of personal goals. Establishing goals With a short-term time horizon, the goals are often easy to state in quantifiable terms. Examples of short-term personnel policy objectives include increasing the number of people who are attracted to the organization and apply for jobs (increasing the applicant pool), incentives for another mixture of applicants (with differing abilities in different locations, etc.) , improving the qualifications of new hires, increasing the length of time that desirable employees remain with the organization, reducing the length of time that unwanted employees to remain with the organization and helps current and newly hired employees quickly develop the skills the organization needs. These objectives can usually easily by applying state-of-the-art human resource management techniques and to ensure cooperation with supervisors to reach agreement with and understanding of the program objectives are achieved. As the workforce shrinks, but the selection conditions will become more bigger. As a result, small marginal gains in test validity have less economic benefit, based on the past. To yield to invest in the development and use of modern methods for selecting economic returns have much more energy to combat the recruitment efforts for the number of candidates because only increase by attracting a large pool of candidates can be considered fair selection addressed are low. If small selection ratio can not be maintained, organizations can be concluded that their resources are better in training, efforts to achieve these few that are available to prepare invested. Examples of innovative recruiting programs are already plentiful. For example X Inc., has a mobile recruitment office, a van that a closed recruitment center that is looking for candidates, by visiting schools, shopping centers, and so on. X-2 employs successful minority business people to help in the community to recruit minority applicants and act as mentors. We can look at a real example: McDonalds Corporation as a leader in the recruitment of older workers emerged, which with TV commercials and formal relationships with senior citizens organizations. It is important to note that these efforts require the pool of candidates so often a coordinated medium-term programs designed to ensure that the non-traditional recruitment are effective and can be retained to expand. Evaluation of Short-Term Human Resource Programs Since for any evaluation of the program, true, this phase involves evaluating how well objectives have been achieved. Due to determine the short-term planning in terms of objectives, in general, that relatively easy to quantify (eg the number of candidates is the number of hires and performance of employees), systematic evaluation of programs for short-term organizational needs, staff development is quite feasible , and some types of program evaluations are indeed common in large organizations. For example, in part because a number of international and state laws prohibit certain forms of discrimination, in particular the selection programs have been carefully checked to ensure that employers make decisions concerning the selection of candidates, characteristics that are job related basis. Legal regulations have prompted many organizations, especially large, to evaluate empirically the relationship between applicant characteristics (eg skills) and job performance. Such evaluation stu dies (validity studies) benefit the employers because they serve the purpose of getting the right people in the right job monitor. Validity studies also serve an academic function by valuable data for researchers interested in improving our understanding of the factors that influence human performance. Until recently, when programs for the selection, training and motivation of HRM analysts criteria of effectiveness have been almost exclusively behavioral changes (such as performance and turnover were assessed) or settings (eg, job satisfaction and commitment). Such criteria have no defense to be accepted by analysts, but line management support for Human Resource programs can be difficult if the expected results of such programs are not translated in the language of business, that is, to get money. Building with continued progress in the utility analysis techniques, and human resources cost estimation techniques, it is always possible compelling economic arguments in support of human resources programs. of So, rather than argue for energy to spend resources to short-term programs that perform HRM analysts in organizational settings are free, more extensively engaged in medium-and long-term human resources issues. Intermediate-Term Human Resource Planning As we have noted, is planning organizations used to the production or service delivery processes buffer from sources of uncertainty. Human resource programs for the recruitment, selection, training and motivation of staff to help reduce the uncertainty by ensuring that a sufficient number of people with the required characteristics and skills are available at all levels in the organizations. If the planning horizon is short, there is little uncertainty about what skills and how many people are needed, and it is forecast to provide relatively easy. However, rapid and ongoing changes in todays business world means that not just the future by simply projecting past trends can be expected. As the focus moves from short term planning in the medium term the question what do we need? is less easy to answer and so is always dominant. For medium-term planning, there is more uncertainty with respect to the question What will there be? Consequently, personnel planning for the distant future quickly raises the question, How can we determine what is needed and what will there be? In other words, more technical attention be given to the problem of forecasting. As a short-term staffing to provide the two problems of forecasting, demand and forecasts of both, before goals can be demonstrated and developed programs are addressed. With the growing uncertainty, the interaction between the human resource planners and line managers is critical for accurate forecasts of supply and demand. Medium-term Demand Forecast To forecast the number and characteristics of people who are necessary to the jobs that will exist in the organization of medium-term future (is in two three years ago), the strategic planner and try to organizational outputs to predict, as expected, the production volume, turnover and levels. The outputs that an organization to deliver produce or to use in combination with the technology, the organization that wants to dictate to generate the outputs, the human resources needs of the intended organization. Prediction outputs needed in view of factors such as future requirements of the market for the products and services, the organization offers, the share of the market that the organization is likely to be able to serve, the availability and nature of new technologies that the amounts can affect, and types of products or services that may be offered, and the various countries to serve in which the organization of it. The task of drawing up plans that specify the intended future results (in terms of quantity, type and location) of the organization is usually the responsibility of middle level managers. Human resource planners need to translate these objectives must be for outputs to predict the amount and type of jobs that people perform in order will produce the desired results. Prediction of future needs of human resources requires: (A) Once an accurate model of the factors that influence the demand and (B) is able to predict the state of all important variables in the model. Organizations that may be quite stable in environments that most models of the main factors that determine the demand for up to three years in the future to construct part. It is even possible that some organizations to quantify the expected values of the variables in their models, what they can statistical forecasting techniques such as regression analysis, using time series analysis and stochastic modeling of the human means demand forecast. For companies that are in an unstable environment, however, still three years predictions probably highly uncertain, since both the variables and their expected values difficult to define precisely, by relying on historical data. Given the complexity of the statistical forecast, it is understandable that the evaluative techniques used more frequently than statistical techniques. A simple type of judgmental forecasting is a Senior estimate. Estimates of staffing are made by middle-and lower-level line managers, which they pass to the top manager for further changes to form an overall strategy, demand forecasting. Increasingly, planners are human resource in these stages of the estimation and revision involved an integrated approach to planning ensured. A more sophisticated method of judgmental forecasting, the Delphi technique, developed a decision-making method in order to maximize benefits and minimize the dysfunctional aspects of group decision making is. In a Delphi session (which must not be face-to-face) take, several experts will present their forecasts and assumptions. An intermediary is any expert in the forecast and assumptions to the other, then the changes in their own forecasts. This process continues until a viable composite forecast is created. The composite may represent specific projections or a series of projections, depending on the expert positions. The Delphi technique seems to be particularly useful for the generation of solutions for unstructured and complex issues, such as those generated during the planning. There are limits, however. For example, if experts do not agree that their views on a final solution that all parties accept the yield can be difficult. Nevertheless, the personnel integrate planners various forecasts to establish the human resource objectives and design programs to achieve these objectives, and line managers are the forecasts as appropriate when they accept offers for their support during th e implementation phase of the Human Resources Programs . Both executives estimates and the Delphi technique usually on forecasts for the number of employees, the focus is likely to be needed. Less attention is usually paid to the question of quality (eg, skills and abilities) that require the prospective employee is primarily because techniques were not widely available for predicting this. If analysts participate in short-term planning, job analysis is used to need the qualities that employees in order to determine current run existing jobs. Rapid technological changes mean jobs in the future are certain jobs in the present, however, differ. As an indication of the fact that HRM analysts now frequently deal with problems of medium-term planning, research, efforts are underway to establish procedures for the implementation of future-oriented (strategic) job analysis and identifying the leadership skills that are necessary for developing effective performance in the future. Because job analysis results in the basis on which the majority of human resource programs are constructed, the development of sound future-oriented job analysis methods is a challenge that must meet HRM analysts before they can realize their potential as contributors to the long-term effectiveness of organizations. Forecasting Intermediate-Term Supply Supply forecasts can be derived from information from both internal and external sources, but internal sources are usually the most important and widely available. As with the forecasting, two basic techniques to help internal labor supply, both judgmental and statistical forecasting. A judgmental forecasting technique to supply replacement planning. Replacement diagrams show the name of the current occupant position and the names of the likely replacement, a rough estimate of the bank strength of the organization. Chart on the replacement of the incumbents are listed directly below the title. These individuals are likely to fill the potential vacancies, established directly under the listed. Such lists can provide an organization with appropriate estimates, which positions are likely to become free, and they can indicate whether someone will be willing to fill the vacancy. Present levels of performance, age, and information on the loyalty of current employees can be used for future vacancies conducted raids of top talents, involuntary turn, predict
Wednesday, October 2, 2019
Jack The Ripper Essay -- essays research papers
The Whitechapel Murders and those of Jack the Ripper are not generally one and the same. Over a period of three years towards the end of the nineteenth century a number of prostitutes were murdered under different circumstances ââ¬â the murder of prostitutes was not an especially unique occurrence during those times but several of the murders drew particular attention on account of the savagery with which the victimââ¬â¢s bodies were mutilated. Within the Whitechapel Murders was a cluster of murders that demonstrated sufficient similarities as to suggest that they were committed by the same person. One of the first instances of serial murder was thus identified and sensationalised in the media as the work of ââ¬ËJack the Ripperââ¬â¢, nicknamed on the strength of a letter, probably a hoax, sent to the Central News Agency and claiming responsibility for the killings. Jack the Ripper was a man, and the killer surely was a man, who did not have the intention to merely kill his victims; he needed to mutilate them. Such was the savagery of his attacks and the enthusiasm of the press, that he successfully terrorised the environs of Whitechapel in East London for several years. In spite of an extensive investigation of the killings, Jack the Ripper was never apprehended nor convincingly identified. The Ripper murders were conducted against a backdrop of appalling social deprivation and unimaginable poverty amongst the poor of East London. The advent of industrialisation resulted in widespread un...
Tuesday, October 1, 2019
Adult Education Essays -- Teaching Education Essays
Adult Education Education is the most important activity that every human should be an active partaker. Education is an activity that is designed to bring about changes in the knowledge, skills, attitudes and perceptions of individuals, groups or communities. Adult learning does not occur in a vacuum. What one needs or wants to learn, what opportunities are available, the manner in which one learns-all are to a large extent determined by the society in which one lives. Whenever adults are asked about their learning, they most often mention education and training programs sponsored by the workplace, colleges and universities, public schools, and other formal organizations. They first picture classrooms with ââ¬Å"studentsâ⬠learning and ââ¬Å"teachersâ⬠teaching in a highly structured format. Yet when we ask these same adults about what they have learned informally over the last year, they typically respond with descriptions of learning activities outside these formal settings. They discuss, for example, remodeling a house, which has involved everything form reading and talking...
Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal Chapter 26
Chapter 26 You can travel the whole world, but there are always new things to learn. For instance, on the way to Capernaum I learned that if you hang a drunk guy over a camel and slosh him around for about four hours, then pretty much all the poisons will come out one end of him or the other. ââ¬Å"Someone's going to have to wash that camel before we go into town,â⬠said Andrew. We were traveling along the shore of the Sea of Galilee (which wasn't a sea at all). The moon was almost full and it reflected in the lake like a pool of quicksilver. It fell to Nathaniel to clean the camel because he was the official new guy. (Joshua hadn't really met Andrew, and Andrew hadn't really agreed to join us, so we couldn't count him as the official new guy yet.) Since Nathaniel did such a fine job on the camel, we let him clean up Joshua as well. Once he had the Messiah in the water Joshua came out of his stupor long enough to slur something like: ââ¬Å"The foxes have their holes and birds have their nests, but the son of man has nowhere to lay his head.â⬠ââ¬Å"That's so sad,â⬠said Nathaniel. ââ¬Å"Yes, it is,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"Dunk him again. He still has barf on his beard.â⬠And so, cleansed and slung over a camel damply, Joshua did by moonlight come into Capernaum, where he would be welcomed as if it were his home. ââ¬Å"Out!â⬠screeched the old woman. ââ¬Å"Out of the house, out of town, out of Galilee for all I care, you aren't staying here.â⬠It was a beautiful dawn over the lake, the sky painted with yellow and orange, gentle waves lapped against the keels of Capernaum's fishing boats. The village was only a stone's throw away from the water, and golden sunlight reflected off the waves onto the black stone walls of the houses, making the light appear to dance to the calls of the gulls and songbirds. The houses were built together in two big clusters, sharing common walls, with entries from every which way, and none more than one story tall. There was a small main road through the village between the two clusters of homes. Along the way were a few merchant booths, a blacksmith's shop, and, on its own little square, a synagogue that looked as if it could contain far more worshipers than the three hundred residents of the village. But villages were thick along the shores of the lake, one running right into the next, and we guessed that perhaps the synagogue served a number of villages. There was no central square around the well as there was in most inland villages, because the people pulled their water from the lake or a spring nearby that bubbled clean chilly water into the air as high as two men. Andrew had deposited us at his brother Peter's house, and we had fallen asleep in the great room among the children only a few hours before Peter's mother-in-law awoke to chase us out of the house. Joshua was holding his head with both hands as if to keep it from falling off his neck. ââ¬Å"I won't have freeloaders and scalawags in my house,â⬠the old woman shouted as she threw my satchel out after us. ââ¬Å"Ouch,â⬠said Joshua, flinching from the noise. ââ¬Å"We're in Capernaum, Josh,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"A man named Andrew brought us here because his nephews stole our camels.â⬠ââ¬Å"You said Maggie was dying,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"Would you have left John if I'd told you that Maggie wanted to see you?â⬠ââ¬Å"No.â⬠He smiled dreamily. ââ¬Å"It was good to see Maggie.â⬠Then the smile turned to a scowl. ââ¬Å"Alive.â⬠ââ¬Å"John wouldn't listen, Joshua. You were in the desert all last month, you didn't see all of the soldiers, even scribes hiding in the crowd, writing down what John was saying. This was bound to happen.â⬠ââ¬Å"Then you should have warned John!â⬠ââ¬Å"I warned John! Every day I warned John. He didn't listen to reason any more than you would have.â⬠ââ¬Å"We have to go back to Judea. John's followers ââ¬â ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Will become your followers. No more preparation, Josh.â⬠Joshua nodded, looking at the ground in front of him. ââ¬Å"It's time. Where are the others?â⬠ââ¬Å"I've sent Philip and Nathaniel to Sepphoris to sell the camels. Bartholomew is sleeping in the reeds with the dogs.â⬠ââ¬Å"We're going to need more disciples,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"We're broke, Josh. We're going to need disciples with jobs.â⬠An hour later we stood on the shore near where Andrew and his brother were casting nets. Peter was taller and leaner than his brother, and he had a head of gray hair wilder than even John the Baptist's, while Andrew pushed his dark hair back and tied it with a cord so it stayed out of his face when he was in the water. They were both naked, which is how men fished the lake when they were close to the shore. I had mixed a headache remedy for Joshua out of tree bark, and I could tell it was working, but perhaps not quite enough. I pushed Joshua toward the shore. ââ¬Å"I'm not ready for this. I feel terrible.â⬠ââ¬Å"Ask them.â⬠ââ¬Å"Andrew,â⬠Joshua called. ââ¬Å"Thank you for bringing us home with you. And you too, Peter.â⬠ââ¬Å"Did my mother-in-law toss you out?â⬠asked Peter. He cast his net and waited for it to settle, then dove into the lake and gathered the net in his arms. There was one tiny fish inside. He reached in and pulled it out, then tossed it back into the lake. ââ¬Å"Grow,â⬠he said. ââ¬Å"You know who I am?â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"I've heard,â⬠said Peter. ââ¬Å"Andrew says you turned water into wine. And you cured the blind and the lame. He thinks that you are going to bring the kingdom.â⬠ââ¬Å"What do you think?â⬠ââ¬Å"I think my little brother is smarter than I am, so I believe what he says.â⬠ââ¬Å"Come with us. We're going to tell people of the kingdom. We need help.â⬠ââ¬Å"What can we do?â⬠said Andrew. ââ¬Å"We're only fishermen.â⬠ââ¬Å"Come with me and I'll make you fishers of men.â⬠Andrew looked at his brother who was still standing in the water. Peter shrugged and shook his head. Andrew looked at me, shrugged, and shook his head. ââ¬Å"They don't get it,â⬠I said to Joshua. Thus, after Joshua had some food and a nap and explained what in the hell he meant by ââ¬Å"fishers of men,â⬠we became seven. ââ¬Å"These guys are our partners,â⬠Peter said, hurrying us along the shore. ââ¬Å"They own the ships that Andrew and I work on. We can't go spread the good news unless they are in on it too.â⬠We came to another small village and Peter pointed out two brothers who were fitting a new oarlock into the gunwale of a fishing boat. One was lean and angular, with jet-black hair and a beard trimmed into wicked points: James. The other was older, bigger, softer, with big shoulders and chest, but small hands and thin wrists, a fringe of brown hair shot with gray around a sunburned bald pate: John. ââ¬Å"Just a suggestion,â⬠Peter said to Joshua. ââ¬Å"Don't say the fisher-of-men thing. It's going to be dark soon; you won't have time for the explanation if we want to make it home in time for supper.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yeah,â⬠I said, ââ¬Å"just tell them about the miracles, the kingdom, a little about your Holy Ghost thing, but stay easy on that until they agree to join up.â⬠ââ¬Å"I still don't get the Holy Ghost thing,â⬠said Peter. ââ¬Å"It's okay, we'll go over it tomorrow,â⬠I said. As we moved down the shore toward the brothers, there was a rustling in some nearby bushes and three piles of rags moved into our path. ââ¬Å"Have mercy on us, Rabbi,â⬠said one of the piles. Lepers. (I need to say something right here: Joshua taught me about the power of love and all of that stuff, and I know that the Divine Spark in them is the same one that is in me, so I should have not let the presence of lepers bother me. I know that announcing them unclean under the Law was as unjust as the Brahmans shunning the Untouchables. I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably wouldn't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them ââ¬Å"parts-dropping-off challenged,â⬠or something. I know all that. But that said, no matter how many healings I saw, lepers always gave me what we Hebrews call the willies. I never got over it.) ââ¬Å"What is it you want?â⬠Joshua asked them. ââ¬Å"Help ease our suffering,â⬠said a female-sounding pile. ââ¬Å"I'll be over there looking at the water, Josh,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"He'll probably need some help,â⬠Peter said. ââ¬Å"Come to me,â⬠Joshua said to the lepers. They oozed on over. Joshua put his hands on the lepers and spoke to them very quietly. After a few minutes had passed, while Peter and I had seriously studied a frog that we noticed on the shore, I heard Joshua say, ââ¬Å"Now go, and tell the priests that you are no longer unclean and should be allowed in the Temple. And tell them who sent you.â⬠The lepers threw off their rags and praised Joshua as they backed away. They looked like perfectly normal people who just happened to be all wrapped up in tattered rags. By the time Peter and I got back to Joshua, James and John were already at his side. ââ¬Å"I have touched those who they said were unclean,â⬠Joshua said to the brothers. By Mosaic Law, Joshua would be unclean as well. James stepped forward and grabbed Joshua's forearm in the style of the Romans. ââ¬Å"One of those men used to be our brother.â⬠ââ¬Å"Come with us,â⬠I said, ââ¬Å"and we will make you oarlock makers of men.â⬠ââ¬Å"What?â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"That's what they were doing when we came up. Making an oarlock. Now you see how stupid that sounds?â⬠ââ¬Å"It's not the same.â⬠And thus we did become nine. Philip and Nathaniel returned with enough money from the sale of the camels to feed the disciples and all of Peter's family as well, so Peter's screeching mother-in-law, who was named Esther, allowed us to stay, providing Bartholomew and the dogs slept outside. Capernaum became our base of operations and from there we would take one- or two-day trips, swinging through Galilee as Joshua preached and performed healings. The news of the coming of the kingdom spread through Galilee, and after only a few months, crowds began to gather to hear Joshua speak. We tried always to be back in Capernaum on the Sabbath so that Joshua could teach at the synagogue. It was that habit that first attracted the wrong sort of attention. A Roman soldier stopped Joshua as he was making the short walk to the synagogue on Sabbath morning. (No Jew was permitted to make a journey of more than a thousand steps from sundown Friday until sundown Saturday ââ¬â all at once, that is. One way. You didn't have to add up your steps all day and just stop when you got to a thousand. There would have been Jews standing all over the place waiting for Saturday sundown if that were the case. It would have been awkward. Suddenly I'm thankful that the Pharisees never thought of that.) The Roman was no mere legionnaire, but a centurion, with the full crested helmet and eagle on his breastplate of a legion commander. He led a tall white horse that looked as if it had been bred for combat. He was old for a soldier, perhaps sixty, and his hair was completely white when he removed his helmet, but he looked strong and the wasp-waisted short sword at his waist looked dangerous. I didn't recognize him until he spoke to Joshua, in perfect, unaccented Aramaic. ââ¬Å"Joshua of Nazareth,â⬠the Roman said. ââ¬Å"Do you remember me?â⬠ââ¬Å"Justus,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"From Sepphoris.â⬠ââ¬Å"Gaius Justus Gallicus,â⬠said the soldier. ââ¬Å"And I'm at Tiberius now, and no longer an under-commander. The Sixth Legion is mine. I need your help, Joshua bar Joseph of Nazareth.â⬠ââ¬Å"What can I do?â⬠Joshua looked around. All of the disciples except Bartholomew and me had managed to sneak away when the Roman walked up. ââ¬Å"I saw you make a dead man walk and talk. I've heard of the things you've done all over Galilee, the healings, the miracles. I have a servant who is sick. Tortured with palsy. He can barely breathe and I can't watch him suffer. I don't ask that you break your Sabbath by coming to Tiberius, but I believe you can heal him, even from here.â⬠Justus dropped to his knee and kneeled in front of Joshua, something I never saw any Roman do to any Jew, before or since. ââ¬Å"This man is my friend,â⬠he said. Joshua touched the Roman's temple and I watched the fear drain out of the soldier's face as I had so many others. ââ¬Å"You believe it to be, so be it,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"It's done. Stand up, Gaius Justus Gallicus.â⬠The soldier smiled, then stood and looked Joshua in the eye. ââ¬Å"I would have crucified your father to root out the killer of that soldier.â⬠ââ¬Å"I know,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"Thank you,â⬠Justus said. The centurion put on his helmet and climbed on his horse. Then looked at me for the first time. ââ¬Å"What happened to that pretty little heartbreaker you two were always with?â⬠ââ¬Å"Broke our hearts,â⬠I said. Justus laughed. ââ¬Å"Be careful, Joshua of Nazareth,â⬠he said. He reined the horse around and rode away. ââ¬Å"Go with God,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"Good, Josh, that's the way to show the Romans what's going to happen to them come the kingdom.â⬠ââ¬Å"Shut up, Biff.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh, so you bluffed him. He's going to get home and his friend will still be messed up.â⬠ââ¬Å"Remember what I told you at the gates of Gaspar's monastery, Biff? That if someone knocked, I'd let them in?â⬠ââ¬Å"Ack! Parables. I hate parables.â⬠Tiberius was only an hour's fast ride from Capernaum, so by morning word had come back from the garrison: Justus's servant had been healed. Before we had even finished our breakfast there were four Pharisees outside of Peter's house looking for Joshua. ââ¬Å"You performed a healing on the Sabbath?â⬠the oldest of them asked. He was white-bearded and wore his prayer shawl and phylacteries wrapped about his upper arms and forehead. (What a jamoke. Sure, we all had phylacteries, every man got them when he turned thirteen, but you pretended that they were lost after a few weeks, you didn't wear them. You might as well wear a sign that said: ââ¬Å"Hi, I'm a pious geek.â⬠The one he wore on his forehead was a little leather box, about the size of a fist, that held parchments inscribed with prayers and looked ââ¬â well ââ¬â as if someone had strapped a little leather box to his head. Need I say more?) ââ¬Å"Nice phylacteries,â⬠I said. The disciples laughed. Nathaniel made an excellent donkey braying noise. ââ¬Å"You broke the Sabbath,â⬠said the Pharisee. ââ¬Å"I'm allowed,â⬠said Josh. ââ¬Å"I'm the Son of God.â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh fuck,â⬠Philip said. ââ¬Å"Way to ease them into the idea, Josh,â⬠I said. The following Sabbath a man with a withered hand came to the synagogue while Joshua was preaching and after the sermon, while fifty Pharisees who had gathered at Capernaum just in case something like this happened looked on, Joshua told the man that his sins were forgiven, then healed the withered hand. Like vultures to carrion they came to Peter's house the next morning. ââ¬Å"No one but God can forgive sins,â⬠said the one they had elected as their speaker. ââ¬Å"Really,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"So you can't forgive someone who sins against you?â⬠ââ¬Å"No one but God.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'll keep that in mind,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"Now unless you are here to hear the good news, go away.â⬠And Joshua went into Peter's house and closed the door. The Pharisee shouted at the door, ââ¬Å"You blaspheme, Joshua bar Joseph, you ââ¬â ââ¬Å" And I was standing there in front of him, and I know I shouldn't have done it, but I popped him. Not in the mouth or anything, but right in the phylacteries. The little leather box exploded with the impact and the strips of parchment slowly settled to the ground. I'd hit him so fast that I think he thought it was a supernatural event. A cry went up from the group behind him, protesting ââ¬â shouting that I couldn't do such a thing, that I deserved stoning, scourging, et cetera, and my Buddhist tolerance just wore a little thin. So I popped him again. In the nose. This time he went down. Two of his pals caught him, and another one at the front of the crowd started to reach into his sash for something. I knew that they could quickly overrun me if they wanted to, but I didn't think they would. The cowards. I grabbed the man who was pulling the knife, twisted it away from him, shoved the iron blade between the stones of Peter's house and snapped it off, then handed the hilt back to him. ââ¬Å"Go away,â⬠I said to him, very softly. He went away, and all of his pals went with him. I went inside to see how Joshua and the others were getting along. ââ¬Å"You know, Josh,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"I think it's time to expand the ministry. You have a lot of followers here. Maybe we should go to the other side of the lake. Out of Galilee for a while.â⬠ââ¬Å"Preach to the gentiles?â⬠Nathaniel asked. ââ¬Å"He's right,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"Biff is right.â⬠ââ¬Å"So it shall be written,â⬠I said. James and John only owned one ship that was large enough to hold all of us and Bartholomew's dogs, and it was anchored at Magdala, two hours' walk south of Capernaum, so we made the trip very early one morning to avoid being stopped in the villages on the way. Joshua had decided to take the good news to the gentiles, so we were going to go across the lake to the town of Gadarene in the state of Decapolis. They kept gentiles there. As we waited on the shore at Magdala, a crowd of women who had come to the lake to wash clothes gathered around Joshua and begged him to tell them of the kingdom. I noticed a young tax collector who was sitting nearby at his table in the shade of a reed umbrella. He was listening to Joshua, but I could also see his eyes following the behinds of the women. I sidled over. ââ¬Å"He's amazing, isn't he?â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"Yes. Amazing,â⬠said the tax collector. He was perhaps twenty, thin, with soft brown hair, a light beard, and light brown eyes. ââ¬Å"What's your name, publican?â⬠ââ¬Å"Matthew,â⬠he said. ââ¬Å"Son of Alphaeus.â⬠ââ¬Å"No kidding, that's my father's name too. Look, Matthew, I assume you can read, write, things like that?â⬠ââ¬Å"Oh yes.â⬠ââ¬Å"You're not married, are you?â⬠ââ¬Å"No, I was betrothed, but before the wedding was to happen, her parents let her marry a rich widower.â⬠ââ¬Å"Sad. You're probably heartbroken. That's sad. You see those women? There's women like that all the time around Joshua. And here's the best part, he's celibate. He doesn't want any of them. He's just interested in saving mankind and bringing the kingdom of God to earth, which we all are, of course. But the women, well, I think you can see.â⬠ââ¬Å"That must be wonderful.â⬠ââ¬Å"Yeah, it's swell. We're going to Decapolis. Why don't you come with us?â⬠ââ¬Å"I couldn't. I've been entrusted to collect taxes for this whole coast.â⬠ââ¬Å"He's the Messiah, Matthew. The Messiah. Think of it. You, and the Messiah.â⬠ââ¬Å"I don't know.â⬠ââ¬Å"Women. The kingdom. You heard about him turning water into wine.â⬠ââ¬Å"I really have to ââ¬â ââ¬Å" ââ¬Å"Have you ever tasted bacon, Matthew?â⬠ââ¬Å"Bacon? Isn't that from pigs? Unclean?â⬠ââ¬Å"Joshua's the Messiah, the Messiah says it's okay. It's the best thing you've ever eaten, Matthew. Women love it. We eat bacon every morning, with the women. Really.â⬠ââ¬Å"I'll need to finish up here,â⬠Matthew said. ââ¬Å"You do that. Here, I'd like you to mark something for me,â⬠I looked over his shoulder at his ledger and pointed to a few names. ââ¬Å"Meet us at the ship when you're ready, Matthew.â⬠I went back over to the shore, where James and John had pulled the ship in close enough for us to wade out to. Joshua finished up blessing the women and sent them back to their laundry with a parable about stains. ââ¬Å"Gentlemen,â⬠I called. ââ¬Å"Excuse me, James, John, you too Peter, Andrew. You will not need to worry about your taxes this season. They've been taken care of.â⬠ââ¬Å"What?â⬠said Peter. ââ¬Å"Where did you get the money ââ¬â ââ¬Å" I turned and waved toward Matthew, who was running toward the shore. ââ¬Å"This good fellow is the publican Matthew. He's here to join us.â⬠Matthew ran up beside me and stood grinning like an idiot while trying to catch his breath. ââ¬Å"Hey,â⬠he said, waving weakly to the disciples. ââ¬Å"Welcome, Matthew,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"All are welcome in the kingdom.â⬠Joshua shook his head, turned, and waded out to the ship. ââ¬Å"He loves you, kid,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"Loves you.â⬠Thus we did become ten. Joshua fell asleep on a pile of nets with Peter's wide straw fishing hat over his face. Before I settled down to be rocked to sleep myself, I sent Philip to the back of the boat to explain the kingdom and the Holy Ghost to Matthew. (I figured that Philip's acumen with numbers might help out when talking to a tax collector.) The two sets of brothers sailed the ship, which was wide of beam and small of sail and very, very slow. About halfway across the lake I heard Peter say, ââ¬Å"I don't like it. It looks like a tempest.â⬠I sat bolt upright and looked at the sky, and indeed, there were black clouds coming over the hills to the east, low and fast, clawing at the trees with lightning as they passed. Before I had a chance to sit up, a wave broke over the shallow gunwale and soaked me to the core. ââ¬Å"I don't like this, we should go back,â⬠said Peter, as a curtain of rain whipped across us. ââ¬Å"The ship's too full and the draft too shallow to weather a storm.â⬠ââ¬Å"Not good. Not good. Not good,â⬠chanted Nathaniel. Bartholomew's dogs barked and howled at the wind. James and Andrew trimmed the sail and put the oars in the water. Peter moved to the stern to help John with the long steering oar. Another wave broke over the gunwale, washing away one of Bartholomew's disciples, a mangy terrier type. Water was mid-shin deep in the bottom of the boat. I grabbed a bucket and began bailing and signaled Philip to help, but he had succumbed to the most rapid case of seasickness I had ever even heard of and was retching over the side. Lightning struck the mast, turning everything a phosphorus white. The explosion was instant and left my ears ringing. One of Joshua's sandals floated by me in the bottom of the boat. ââ¬Å"We're doomed!â⬠wailed Bart. ââ¬Å"Doomed!â⬠Joshua pushed the fishing hat back on his head and looked at the chaos around him. ââ¬Å"O ye of little faith,â⬠he said. He waved his hand across the sky and the storm stopped. Just like that. Black clouds were sucked back over the hills, the water settled to a gentle swell, and the sun shone down bright and hot enough to raise steam off our clothes. I reached over the side and snatched the swimming doggy out of the waves. Joshua had laid back down with the hat over his face. ââ¬Å"Is the new kid looking?â⬠he whispered to me. ââ¬Å"Yeah,â⬠I said. ââ¬Å"He impressed?â⬠ââ¬Å"His mouth is hanging open. He looks sort of stricken.â⬠ââ¬Å"Great. Wake me when we get there.â⬠I woke him a little before we reached Gadarene because there was a huge madman waiting for us on the shore, foaming at the mouth, screaming, throwing rocks, and eating the occasional handful of dirt. ââ¬Å"Hold up there, Peter,â⬠I said. The sails were down again and we were rowing in. ââ¬Å"I should wake the master,â⬠said Peter. ââ¬Å"No, it's okay, I have the stop-for-foaming-madmen authority.â⬠Nevertheless, I kicked the Messiah gently. ââ¬Å"Josh, you might want to take a look at this guy.â⬠ââ¬Å"Look, Peter,â⬠said Andrew, pointing to the madman, ââ¬Å"he has hair just like yours.â⬠Joshua sat up, pushed back Peter's hat and glanced to the shore. ââ¬Å"Onward,â⬠he said. ââ¬Å"You sure?â⬠Rocks were starting to land in the boat. ââ¬Å"Oh yeah,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"He's very large,â⬠said Matthew, clarifying the already clear. ââ¬Å"And mad,â⬠said Nathaniel, not to be outdone in stating the obvious. ââ¬Å"He is suffering,â⬠said Joshua. ââ¬Å"Onward.â⬠A rock as big as my head thudded into the mast and bounced into the water. ââ¬Å"I'll rip your legs off and kick you in the head as you crawl around bleeding to death,â⬠said the madman. ââ¬Å"Sure you don't want to swim in from here?â⬠Peter said, dodging a rock. ââ¬Å"Nice refreshing swim after a nap?â⬠said James. Matthew stood up in the back of the boat and cleared his throat. ââ¬Å"What is one tormented man compared to the calming of a storm? Were you all in the same boat I was?â⬠ââ¬Å"Onward,â⬠Peter said, and onward we went, the big boat full of Joshua and Matthew and the eight faithless pieces of shit that were the rest of us. Joshua was out of the boat as soon as we hit the beach. He walked straight up to the madman, who looked as if he could crush the Messiah's head in one of his hands. Filthy rags hung in tatters on him and his teeth were broken and bleeding from eating dirt. His face contorted and bubbled as if there were great worms under the skin searching for an escape. His hair was wild and stuck out in a great grayish tangle, and it did sort of look like Peter's hair. ââ¬Å"Have mercy on me,â⬠said the madman. His voice buzzed in his throat like a chorus of locusts. I slid out of the boat and the others followed me quietly up behind Joshua. ââ¬Å"What is your name, Demon?â⬠Joshua asked. ââ¬Å"What would you like it to be?â⬠said the demon. ââ¬Å"You know, I've always been partial to the name Harvey,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"Well, isn't that a coincidence?â⬠said the demon. ââ¬Å"My name just happens to be Harvey.â⬠ââ¬Å"You're just messing with me, aren't you?â⬠said Josh. ââ¬Å"Yeah, I am,â⬠said the demon, busted. ââ¬Å"My name is Legion, for there are a bunch of us in here.â⬠ââ¬Å"Out, Legion,â⬠Joshua commanded. ââ¬Å"Out of this big guy.â⬠There was a herd of pigs nearby, doing piggy things. (I don't know what they were doing. I'm a Jew, what do I know from pigs, except that I like bacon?) A great green glow came out of Legion's mouth, whipped through the air like smoke, then came down on the heard of pigs like a cloud. In a second it was sucked into the pigs' nostrils and they began foaming and making locust noises. ââ¬Å"Be gone,â⬠said Joshua. With that the pigs all ran into the sea, sucked huge lungfuls of water, and after only a little kicking, drowned. Perhaps fifty dead pigs bobbed in the swell. ââ¬Å"How can I thank you?â⬠said the big foaming guy, who had stopped foaming, but was still big. ââ¬Å"Tell the people of your land what has happened,â⬠Joshua said. ââ¬Å"Tell them the Son of God has come to bring them the good news of the Holy Ghost.â⬠ââ¬Å"Clean up a little before you tell them,â⬠I said. And off he went, a lumbering monster, bigger even than our own Bartholomew, and smelling worse, which I hadn't thought possible. We sat down on the beach and were sharing some bread and wine when we heard the crowd approaching through the hills. ââ¬Å"The good news travels quickly,â⬠said Matthew, whose fresh-faced enthusiasm was starting to irritate me a little now. ââ¬Å"Who killed our pigs?â⬠The crowd was carrying rakes and pitchforks and scythes and they didn't look at all like they were there to receive the Gospel. ââ¬Å"You fuckers!â⬠ââ¬Å"Kill them!â⬠ââ¬Å"In the boat,â⬠said Josh. ââ¬Å"O ye of little ââ¬â â⬠Matthew's comment was cut short by Bart grabbing him by the collar and dragging him down the beach to the boat. The brothers had already pushed off and were up to their chests in the water. They pulled themselves in and James and John helped set the oars as Peter and Andrew pulled us into the boat. We fished Bart's disciples out of the waves by the scruffs of their necks and set sail just as the rocks began to rain down on us. We all looked at Joshua. ââ¬Å"What?â⬠he said. ââ¬Å"If they'd been Jews that pig thing would have gone over great. I'm new at gentiles.â⬠There was a messenger waiting for us when we reached Magdala. Philip unrolled the scroll and read. ââ¬Å"It's an invitation to come to dinner in Bethany during Passover week, Joshua. A ranking member of the Sanhedrin requests your presence at dinner at his home to discuss your wonderful ministry. It's signed Jakan bar Iban ish Nazareth.â⬠Maggie's husband. The creep. I said, ââ¬Å"Good first day, huh, Matthew?ââ¬
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